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Posts tagged “Writing

Happy New Year – 2017

This Year

Another year gone.

Another day is done.

Another revolution around the sun.

New dreams born.

Resolutions torn.

Fears, hates, desperately spurned.

Did you cry last year?

Did you laugh last year?

Did you cling to simple hope last year?

Did you hurt last year?

Did you tickle a rib last year?

Did you lift your face to the sky last year?

Then, maybe you have lived this last year.

In what is to come.

There is much to fear.

But then, there is reason for hope,

in this new year.

Lift your face to the sun this year.

Lift your voice in song this year.

Don’t forget the strength of your heart this year.

There is hope to be found this year.

If you but know where to look this year.

As long as you live this year.

There is hope.

Look deep within, that which is you.

Find your bliss, and then go pursue.

The thing that makes you jump for joy.

The things that cause you, your heart to employ.

The things that challenge,

And sometimes cause you to rip out your hair.

These things are things to reach for this year.

Ignore the things, that are far too big to handle.

Rather, look inward.

There you’ll find things, that life cannot dismantle.

There is hope this year.

If you but have courage this year.

Believe me, you can this year.

If you but have the will this year.

Believe it or not.

It’s in your hands.

Despite all you see,

that might reprimand.

Have faith and believe,

in all that you are.

And you will accomplish much this year.

Welcome to  2017!

Happy New Year!


Sometimes We Fall

I’ve been ill for the best part of the last fortnight. As a result, I’ve spent a lot of time watching movies. I haven’t written anything in quite sometime, beyond my #startright memes that is. And to me, those don’t really count. Mainly, because they’re not a balm for me like writing poetry is. I don’t feel like I’m releasing a great deal of myself at all. I never realised I was seeking any sort of release until the movie I watched two days ago, Batman Begins. I can’t begin to count the number of times I’ve seen it, but there’s a line in it that always, always gets me: “Why do we fall?” I did what I always do, thought about it a great deal. Then this piece was born:

Sometimes We Fall

Sometimes we fall.

Sometimes we trip.

Sometimes the fear takes over,

And we give in to our baser nature.

Sometimes we fall.

Sometimes we forget.

Sometimes we forget that we are stronger.

Sometimes we forget what came before.

So, sometimes we fall.

We forget, we repeat.

We repeat mistakes that should never be repeated.

Sometimes we fall.

Sometimes we’re silent too long,

We forget to speak.

Sometimes we crawl too long,

We forget to stand.

Sometimes we fall.

Sometimes we don’t realise we have fallen,

as we wallow.

Sometimes we fall.

Sometimes we fall.

This is our lot.

Sometimes we hurt.

This is our lot too.

Sometimes we fall.

But, we must not be defeated.

Sometimes we fall.

But we cannot stay lost.

We all fall at some point.

It’s part of our humanity.

And yes, we all hurt sometimes.

This is life.

Another truth that we ca never deny…

Yet, must we rise.


The Unknown End

Pursue The Unknown End

When you branch out, you do this.

When you try different things, you do this.

When you thirst for something, beyond the usual.

Beyond the mundane.

You pursue the unknown end.

When you set sail, and plot a course,

beyond the prescribed route, you do this.

It is a route fraught with unseen pitfalls

and often meandering trails.

Yet, it is the route you must take,

when you seek to pursue the unknown end.

And why?

Why must you do this?

Why must you leave the comfortable?

Why must you leave the unknown,

and cleave to the unknown?

We must leave, because it is comfortable.

We must leave, because it is known.

And we reach for the unknown,

because it is unknown.

There are things to be seen, that these eyes wish to see.

There are tongues that these ears wish to hear.

And passions to quicken this heart.

So when the shores recede and doubts proceed,

to buffet as we try to make headway.

We cling to this purpose.

We cling to this lifeline.

This line to hope.

Keeps us afloat.

Keeps us fighting.

And reminds us of why we set sail.

We set sail so we might quiver.

We set sail so we might touch

We set sail so we might feel,

the beating heart of this very world.

If we wish to feel, to see,

and become new things.

We must dig deep, take a step.

And pursue the unknown end.


Hope – “Pursuing The Unknown End”

The thing with following your dreams. The thing we never document when we encourage people to strive for and pursue their excellence, is the pain that comes with it. When we document the journey, we want the world to see our triumphs and we post our pictures online with smiley faces, living a tremendously joyous existence. We proclaim, we hashtag, that we are “#livingthedream” and we tweet about the people we’ve met, the places we’ve gone, and the many wonderful things we may have done. Somehow we happen to miss out the heartache, tears and the loneliness that can come with it.

While all that we share is no lie, those who read, or look at these pictures always forget that this is only a part of the whole story. A truth nevertheless. I am reminded of a movie called ‘Just Married’ that starred Ashton Kutcher and Brittany Murphy. The lead man (played by Kutcher) was being advised by his father about marriage. He pointed to pictures in a photo album, and he spoke of those joyous moments. Here’s the quote from that scene:

“Some days your mother and me loved each other. Other days we had to work at it. You never see the hard days in a photo album… but those are the ones that get you from one happy snapshot to the next.”

I am caused to think on the quote above. A while ago I wrote a blog about making it a year in Berlin. I’ve had a number of months that were more than a little difficult. These are not documented in pictures, or with tweets, or even Facebook updates. In time to come, I will look back over many of these tweets and status updates and think on all I lived through between those pictures. When I look at those tweets or pictures, I will remember vividly the difficult times, without need of documented words or pictures. I will remember the tears that came during the absent updates. I will remember the fears and loneliness only too easily. So why, oh why do I need to document them physically? Their emotional toll is clear for me to see.

A close friend of mine messaged me a while ago, having read my blog post ‘Letter To A Friend‘ and I found myself touched by her message.

The message was simple:

“I just wanted to tell you that whatever happens, don’t lose hope….Even when/if you lose yourself…Even when/if nothing means anything anymore. I know you know this, but I still wanted to let you know.”

This is part of what helps me to continue moving on when things get difficult, as they tend to do.

In more recent past, I attended  my sister’s wedding in the UK. I am happy to tell you I was beyond proud. I was asked a few days before I left Berlin, if I would cry at the wedding, I of course proclaimed that there was little chance of this happening. I am far from ashamed to tell you I cried as I watched her walking down the aisle. It has been many a year since I last shed a tear, so I didn’t anticipate it. But, seeing her walking down the aisle, with tears pouring down her face was too much for me. Later at the reception, I had cause to tear up once again when the time for the first dance came along. I recollect querying what they would be dancing to, my sister’s response was that it’s a surprise. I presumed twas a surprise for the audience, so I was happy to wait and see. They took to the dancefloor and the song began. I remember all too well, recognising the guitar intro, but uncertain as to the song itself, then the voice…and it was my voice! My song Weathervane, was the song they used for their first dance. I was beyond surprised! I looked to my other sister, in utter shock. I couldn’t believe it. Both were singing along. I hugged her and wept like I haven’t wept in forever, as she told me

‘Never doubt yourself. Ever’

The reason I share this? In time to come, as you go about pursuing your unknown end, you will go through what can only be called trying times. These are a part of our lot. I see them as almost a necessity. These help us to decide exactly how much we want whatever it is we are chasing. Whatever this unknown end may be, the trying times are an essential part of the journey. It is at this point that we ask ourselves if we really want this thing we seek. These trying times have the ability to break many. You have to ensure you are not one of those many. Reach back to something that will help to sustain you. For me, hearing my song at my sister’s wedding, for her first dance to boot, will stick in my mind for many a year. For me, this is a huge achievement. I intend to achieve more in my little life, but I’m uncertain that anything else I do will top that. Hold to the ‘little’ achievements. Let these encourage you as you move forward. I have come to learn that everything I want won’t come all at once. It may seem an obvious thing to many. But if you’re anything like me when it comes to dreams, you want it all at once. And you want it now. And with every little setback, we wish to curl up and die. But you always get back up, you will always keep going, because you simply have to seek the unknown end.

 

Dare


Musings

I sort of retreated into  myself for the last few months. Whenever that happens, after a while I try to pull myself out by reading some of my old stuff. I found a poem I wrote in 2007:

 

Musings

It’s not an easy thing,

looking back on your own life.

Sometimes you see nothing but trouble and strife.

I’ve seen a little too much for my own mind.

I’ve hardly seen any in the mind of some younger.

So, I look back at my life and wonder;

What can I give?

How can I share with you the life I chose to live?

Was it circumstance or was it choice?

That causes me sometimes to raise my voice.

“I’d like to teach the world to sing.”

It’s a fine sentiment I do agree.

But what song would I teach to everyone,

so they could always dance with glee?

Should I show them what makes me laugh,

and hope that they laugh too?

Or should I show them what made me cry,

so they turn away from view?

This world is a hard place to live.

With many hard lessons to teach.

Sometimes we lose the lesson,

it’s just beyond our reach.

But here’s what I’d love to teach,

to each and everyone.

No matter what you face in this world,

it’s not stronger than you.

You stand up tall and face your foe,

even if it turns out just to be you.

Learn to laugh and smile and sing,

no matter what life brings.

Remember to extend your helping hand to others,

even when you have fallen short.

Always do this even though sometimes you don’t feel you ought.

For you help not them when you reach out your hand,

you help your own heart to cease to reprimand.

This is what causes me to laugh when I should cry.

This is what causes me to sing when I should wail.

This is what brings my smile to greet you when we meet.

For when you smile back, I feel the world is at my feet!


Happy New Year! (2016)

It’s that time of year again. And to welcome you into the near year, here is my new offering. My first in many months. Though I started this tradition of mine many years ago. I plan to continue it for many years to come:

 

The New Year

We talk of new seasons, we talk of new days.

We talk of resolutions, in beautiful new ways.

We build relationships, we tear them down.

We reach through the ages, to dispel a frown.

This year gone, oh what joy, what pain.

So many songs, I still hear the refrain.

But as I look to tomorrow, to see what’s to come.

What’s apt to follow, considering what’s begun.

There is excitement, there is fear.

Trepidation, but a veneer.

A stronghold insistence, on resisting the persistence,

That life is but an existence, to be tolerated and endured.

Forgetting the laughter, the joy.

The love you could deploy.

In this new year, despite aggravation.

My sole recommendation is to live in the joy.

For happiness is a choice.

So, every day, from now till ever.

Make a vow, ties with bitterness to sever.

For that future place, the thing that you dream of.

The path to that place, something to lean on.

The way that you see.

The way that you think.

The way that you hear.

These will pull you from the brink.

Be the light when it’s dark.

That single solitary spark.

Be a voice when silence screams.

Even when all would burst at the seems.

In this new year, in this new day,

be the reason for others to say,

here is one who would not lean on excuse.

To lend a helping hand, he would never refuse.

So, as we talk of new seasons, we talk of new days.

As we talk of resolutions, in beautiful new ways.

Let us build relationships, and seek never to tear them down.

By all means, let us reach through the ages, to dispel that single solitary frown.

As this new year dawns.

As this new day begins.

Reach deep down inside you.

Find that love.

Let it shine!

Happy New Year!

😀

 


Come To Me

I recently decided that I want to take on the 100 day poetry challenge. But decided I should try writing a poem a week first. I used to do this some years back. Anyway, here’s a old poem I wrote over a decade ago.

 

Come To Me

Come to me and let us talk.

Let us talk till moon and stars are gone.

Let us talk till sky and sun are one.

Come to me and let us talk.

 

Let us talk till sand and sea is gone.

Let us talk till you and I are one.

Take me in your arms my dear.

Let me feel your tenderness so near.

 

Come let me reach down deep inside of you,

and touch those places hidden from view.

Come to me beauty and let us sing together.

Come to me…Let us flow together.

 

In harmony, you and I, we’ll hum together.

Your song shall resonate in me.

And my song shall resonate in you.

And we’ll crescendo in a blaze of fire.

 

The sun will seem warm in comparison,

to the heat of you and I together.

So my dear, you’ve heard the words.

Now all you need to do is…Come to me


Why Must I Write?

The last few months have been a bit difficult for me. In truth, it’s not completely unexpected. When you branch out to forge a different path for yourself than the one you’re already on, there are bound to be a plethora of difficulties. What makes things sometimes worse is that I haven’t written in an absolute age. So I went looking through some of my older work, in the hopes of maybe finding some inspiration on reconnecting with myself. And I came across this:

Why Must I Write

Why exactly must I write?
Shall I write to show you my very heart?
Or shall I write simply because I can?
In truth I write because I feel I must.
I feel I must catalogue all, before I return to dust.
Yeah, when all is said and done, and everything is gone.
It must be written down.
It must be written down.
The battles that were fought?
They must be written down.
The conquests that we had?
They must be written down.
The hearts that we broke? Yes, they must all be written down.

This, is why I write.
I write to tell you my story.
Now you know, will you share my glory?


New Year (2015)

At the end of every year I write a new poem to usher in the new year. Last year, for the first time in a number of years, I neglected to do so. I shan’t do the same this year.

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2014 has been a year of change for me. In January, I graduated from my Masters degree in Music Performance, with a fairly clear plan for the year. I was going to travel to Italy, as I had done during the summer for a few years. I had planned to spend a few months there, then possibly head to Ankara, Turkey for another few months. Italy fell through, and I had to change my plans. Halfway through the year, I moved to Berlin. I write this on Christmas eve and I’m sitting on my bed (I’ll type it up later)

It’s my first Christmas away from the UK in over two decades. Though I’ve spent the season on my own in years gone by. It feels quite different to be in a new country that I am yet to be able to call home. And as I prepare to celebrate my first Christmas away from home, I gain new respect for the many international students I have known over the years. I don’t know how you did. Though, I’m glad you did, and I am richer for knowing you.

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As I sit here, I think on the future. For the last decade, I had followed a plan. I’ve come to the end of that and I have no plan now. And I’m not ashamed to tell you that it’s a scary place for me.

Purpose

A new year beckons.

A new day begins.

As this new sun rises,

A new season begins with it.

A season of hope.

A season of joy.

A season of fulfilled dreams.

A season of new drive.

A season of new challenges.

Just like any other.

But a season with new determination.

So you need not run for cover.

As we open ours eyes.

To face this new day.

We think new thoughts.

We dream new dreams.

We see new faces.

To guide us on our way.

We step into new phases.

And in joy, our heads we lay.

Purpose must drive you.

And circumstance, not beguile you.

You need to be clear,

on who it is you are.

Be that one,

who believes in dreams.

Be that one,

who knows dreams can come true.

Lean not on excuse.

Don’t let fear stop you.

Negativity, you must refuse.

Else your tears proceed to drown you.

And when dark days come.

As they tend to do.

Reach deep inside,

To the strength in you.

Forget not, who you are.

Neglect not, your distant star.

Rather, stand firm for what you believe.

Reach far and you may yet receive.

Be brave and you’ll achieve.

Be true to you and in yourself believe.

As the new day begins,

see in it, a new hope.

See in it, a new chance.

And don’t be afraid.

Look back, to see where you’ve come from.

Then look forward, see where you’re going.

With a smile on your face, and hope in your heart.

Know that the future is indeed bright!

Happy New Year everyone! Make 2015 amazing! 🙂

stones


New Beginnings

For a writer, I really do seem to suck at this blogging thing. In my defence, I’ve been trying to figure to figure out the next chapter in my little life. Just over month ago I left my job at Kingston University. My almost a decade at KU and end and pretty soon i was on a one way flight to my new locale.

 

I always said that I studied for a reason, and that reason wasn’t to sit behind a desk. There’s nothing wrong with it, I worked behind a desk for almost ten years before returning to study, and it confirmed that’s it’s not what I’m looking for out of my career.I wasn’t seeking the 9 to 5 life. Despite thoroughly enjoying my time at Kingston International, it was never my final destination.

 

The last few weeks before I left were more than a little crazy, and my final days prior to leaving were even more so. One or two things showed up, that if not for the fact that a flight had been booked, a flat found and all necessarty preparations had already been made, I might have called it all off and stayed in dear old Kingston.

 

I’ve heard it said that sometimes to find yourseelf, you need to lose yourself. I couldn’t possibly count how many times I’ve lost or found myself. I seem to be on a perpetual journey of self discovery. My time time here in Berlin has been no different in that regard. While I’m here in dear Berlin, I shall see what life wishes to teach me.

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