I look back at 2012, trying to decide what type of year it was.
To say that last year was busy is something of an understatement!
To be proud or not to be proud. Still uncertain.
There was a lot of pain to be sure. There were some joys. So that at least tries to balance it out.
I went to the Copenhagen Jazz festival and I got to see someone I haven’t seen in way too many years. That alone is worth the shed tears. I’ve made many new acquaintances this year. Some may very well become friends. And for someone who no longer does friends, I call that a win. It tells me that despite all, somewhere inside I am still quintessentially me. Much has changed in my personality in the last 19 years, but I’m glad that there is something that survives of my 15 year old self.
I no longer dance. I stopped performing as a dancer and teaching after a car accident that messed up my lower spine. When I danced, I believed very much in dancing from the inside out. Accessing what was inside and then expressing via the medium of dance. I’ve not always lived by the exact same ethos, but every so often I do try. I love to sing, but singing is something I learnt to do. I have no talent for it. I was a natural dancer and I miss it often. Everytime i try to expres something with my voice and cannot, I remember when my body could do it and miss it more. I think I should try to start dancing again.
Last year, while trying to decide on my next life challenge, I decided to work on an album. (What was I thinking!)
After months of thinking on concepts and trying to decide whether to write new songs, I decided to use some of the songs I already have, as I’ve written many songs and still have many unfinished. I’ve released the first single of the album and am working on the next few now.
This year I shall finally make that visit to Spain that I’ve been planning for ages. If I’m lucky, I’ll get to work in Italy again. I also need to visit France again at some point, though it isn’t Paris that beckons this time around.
I need to, and therefore will, finish my masters.
And finally…This year, I need to push forward with the album, finish it. Release it then see where it all goes from there. My plan is to leave the country for pastures new. But if the music does well while I’m here, I’ll stay a little longer. First and foremost, I need a music manager. So if anyone knows of a music manager looking for a client, PLEASE let me know!
Reading through the above, I realise there is a lot that will cause stress, knowing me. And I may need to finally learn how to relax. I’ve not been able to do that for as long as I can remember.
Forgive the ramblings of a crazy TJ. Life often takes me on many twists and turns, sometimes fun and other times not so much. It all fills my head with mulch and then there’s a brain dump!
Till the next time.
- Dance like nobody’s watching (slideshare.net)